All-Star Coworker Proves Value By Forwarding Article After Hours

(If I wrote for The Onion. Which I don't. Yet.)

In a display of what can only be described as absolute commitment, John Bauer, co-assistant manager of administrative operations, couldn't help but forward a marginally relevant article - that he himself, admittedly, hadn't thoroughly read - to the rest of his team when he stumbled upon it via Flipboard while looking for a Comic-Con 2015 recap after dinner. "You don't get opportunities like that every day," said John, who was just coming off a recent meeting invite he sent out for 9:00 AM. "I saw the headline, read the first seven words, and knew immediately that this could make up for my three and a half hours of minesweeper today. You're not gonna print that, right?"


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