Showing posts from August, 2009

Keep it Simple

I was trying to help my step mother setup a printer with her new computer the other day, and it only contributed to my hatred of Windows. You can follow the same process that has worked on a dozen other PCs, but for whatever reason, it doesn't work this time. The inconsistency kills me. At least I know that if something doesn't work on one Mac, it won't work on any. With Windows, you have to tailor IT support not just to the specific issue, but to the specific computer. It adds an extra lair of complexity and variables that I'm simply not interested in dealing with. Which reminds me of another problem with Microsoft. I honestly didn't have a true appreciation of it until seeing this video, but after watching, you'll understand.

Don't Front

Dear Writer, Just because your movie has people in it, doesn't mean it was based on a true story. Thanks.


I know you all want to say heighth because of width and length, but that doesn't come close to qualifying as legitimate justification. 1. You sound like you have a lisp when you pronounce it like that. 2. The word has enough Hs in it already, can't you just leave well enough alone. 3. By that logic you should say weighth and tangine too. I expect anyone who still says heighth to spend a lot of time at Ye Olde Candy Shoppe and commute on a bike like this: Note: I try to keep the nerdiness to a minimum, but it snuck out in the latter part of number 3. If you need a hint, think right triangle.

Check That

Several years ago I decided that every company should have someone they can turn to who will take a step back, evaluate an idea, say it's the stupidest thing they've ever heard, and end the project immediately. I actually think I had this revelation right around the time when the Pontiac Aztec was released. Coincidence? I think not. How many times have you seen a product and said to yourself, "Self, someone really got paid to come up with that?" I've said it more times than I can remember. Those exact words. Verbatim. There are some companies that simply do not have the means to employ this person in a full-time roll, so a consultant would probably be the best option. They could be brought in periodically to scrutinize several projects at a time. Yes, it's my dream job. Just think about how much better the world would be if I had realized my calling sooner. I could have stopped this: ...and this: ...and above all else, this:


As the picture above so aptly demonstrates, no time is the right time for a v-neck shirt on a man.